So, four months ago (!!!), I brought a sweet baby boy into this world. I still look at him and wonder how in the world this baby is ours! I’ve dreamt of being a mom for so long and all of a sudden here I am, barely remembering what life was like before he arrived. I’ve been wanting to write an update on mommy life for awhile now, but I can’t decide how to organize my thoughts on it all. The birth story, the many emotions, the excitement, the newness, the difficulty. Not to mention that I have to choose between showering, working out, cleaning the house, or folding laundry during my child’s 30 minute naps. (we’re working on that) In conclusion, it’s taken me much too long to sit down and write about these past few months.
However, today is a new day! I’m going to start at the very beginning with a few details and thoughts on my baby’s birthday. It feels like it was just yesterday, but I currently have a not-so-tiny baby boy sitting on my lap grabbing at the computer keys to remind me that it wasn’t!
Our little guy arrived on April 22nd at 6:26 in the evening. This isn’t going to be a typical “birth story” because I don’t really feel like my readers will enjoy the less than lovely details that go into that type of post. That being said, I’m going to sum it up with a few different points/thoughts/reflections from the day:
• I delivered four days early. And it was the best thing EVER because I had zero time to start freaking out about labor. I was still checking off that pre-baby to-do list, thinking I had at least a solid four more days to get things done. It’s okay, though, considering the last things on the list included things like “deep clean the kuerig” and “double check my labor bag for the millionth time.”
• Don’t rely on the many things people tell you about birth. I was told I’d never go early with my first baby and I was also told that I shouldn’t expect my water to break. Well. I went early and my water broke in the middle of the night before any other labor signs. It ended up being a good thing, however, because I was able to be admitted into a delivery room as soon as I arrived!
• I know this is controversial for some, but I honestly don’t know why anyone would ever go through labor without an epidural. Within ten minutes, I went from barely being able to talk through the pain to actually being able to enjoy the hours leading up to my baby’s birth. We watched a movie, scrolled facebook, texted family members, and shared the excitement of our baby’s arrival. But, hey, all the more power to you if you can push through the pain without it!
• When the nurse tells you that you’ve dilated from 5cm to almost 8cm in 15 minutes and starts getting things ready for your baby’s impending arrival, don’t turn your movie off, get all excited, and have your mom start heading to the hospital because it could still be hours before your baby arrives.
• I’m really not a chill person. My husband can attest to this. But I felt surprisingly chill and peaceful throughout the entire labor process. I made it my goal in the months leading up to the birth to have zero expectations and no specific plan. I figured I wouldn’t be a mess if things didn’t go according to plan if there was no plan! I highly recommend this to other pregnant mommies out there! It was seriously the best thing I did and helped me to remain calm throughout the ups and downs of the day. It also proved to me more then ever that God gives you the grace you need when you need it.
• Don’t let the movies fool you when they show these pretty moms who push their baby out in 2.5 seconds surrounded by nurses and doctors because it doesn’t happen like that. When they told me that I probably wouldn’t push for long, I was thinking 15-20 minutes tops. Oh no. Try 2 hours. And by far, the most painful and exhausting 2 hours of the entire day.
• But suddenly, you’re done! You feel a million times better and nothing else matters because you’re looking at a healthy, bright-eyed baby boy. A baby that you’ve only dreamt about for the past nine months. And just like that, you’re a family of three! It feels so surreal. The emotions come like waves over you but you’re too exhausted to really dwell on any single one.
• I had myself so worried about recovering from birth. I read all those articles about “the 10 things nobody tells you about birth” that go into detail about what to expect after you deliver the baby. I expected the worst. But here’s what those articles don’t say. You’re so overjoyed by your new little baby that none of it really matters. Sure, you’re sore and tired and still have a pregnant looking belly. But it all pales in comparison to the joy, excitement, and this newfound love.
• Being pregnant and giving birth gives you a whole new insight into God’s care and creativity. He formed this baby boy inside of me and created me to be able to bring him life and sustain him afterwards. It’s truly a miracle! I’m so thankful to God for blessing our family with this precious boy.
And that day was just the beginning of the adventure! I’ll be sure to post many more thoughts and reflections on motherhood in the coming days.